In a moment I'm going to tell you the root cause that kills all relationship and strangled yours. Right now you're suffering because of your relationship. The emotional turmoil and pain you're in because of your breakup or relationship problem is costing you your quality of life.

You may have searched for the answer to the question, “how do I get my ex back” and I'm going to help you by showing you why your relationship broke up.

It is not about loss of interest, loss of attraction or incompatibility. It is much deeper so read on.

As an , I notice one shift in mindset can translate to amazing results. As a life coach, I see people experiencing so much joy, love, peace and happiness in all areas of their lives " business, home, relationships with others, health. Setting the into motion to achieve what you want can be a powerful force along this path. And I know this, and still I myself make mistakes.
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I made some big mistakes last year and I want to share the results with you.

Everything Ive ever taught has had this concept at the core: Be happy first, and everything else works itself out.

When work, commitment, and pleasure all become one and you reach that deep well where lives, nothing is impossible. Unknown. Have you ever met anyone like this person who has tapped the deep well where lives? They have that quiet energy, that charisma that tells you that they have found the secret. They are living in a place where knowledge, skills and talent are all working in perfect harmony, passionately pursuing their . Have you met someone like that? Are you someone like that? Its wonderful to be in their presence isnt it? Their energy just makes you smile.
Knowledge is the stuff that you learn. Skills are the things you learn to do. Talent is a God-given gift that you have, and can harness. When all three are working in concert, you have found your sweet spot. You have found what you were put on this planet to do; what indelible mark you are to make on others in this world. Its magical to find that zone.
How do you know if you are hitting that sweet spot? Five things will tell you:
You are good at it. You like it. You are energized by it. You are propelled to do it. People are blessed by you when you do it.
It takes hitting all five of these things to really know you are in your passion place. There are things for which you are skilled, but they may not give you energy. I have never liked chess. My brother loves it. Guess which one of us is good at it?
In many cases, you like something because you are good at it; but, not always. Sometimes you are good at something but you dont enjoy it and it doesnt give you energy. I can write grants, but I dont love writing grants. So, it is a skill to rely on, but not one for which to build my career upon. I love facilitation. I am good at it, and I get energy from it. So, I do it as much as I can.
I think that the most important thing on the list above is that people are blessed when you do it. Nothing makes you feel more satisfied than knowing that you have helped and blessed people with your gifts, talents and service. Thats what propels you to do it. Knowing that it doesnt just make you feel good to serve with your gifts, but that your service benefits others.
Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it. – Unknown
P.S. The Heart: passion for your work is one of the body parts that will be worked in the Leadership Anatomy Womans Retreat: The Body of Skills you Need to Bring your Dream to Life; November 17-21, 2010 in the Sonoma Valley of California. For more information Click Leadership Anatomy-Womens Retreat .

CPR Series
Things we need to know BEFORE emotional disaster strikes!

Emotion = Energy in Motion

Letting go!

I am often asked “How do I let go?” or “How did you let go?” That is such a tough answer. What I learned in 30 years of grieving is this: To truly let go, those arms have to open up and release all of it, the longing, the pain, the emptiness. When I no longer clutched at my heart with closed fists, along with a pillow, clothing, something of my childs in my hands…and opened up my heart and hands and let it all float off them into the universe, finally came within. I can now take those empty arms and cross my heart with open hands and have an “angel hug of love” and it is good.

Relationships, when left on auto-pilot can sometimes become stale. Every day begins to replicate and suddenly the basis of each day consists of ?Good morning honey, How was your day honey, Dinner was delicious, Sweet dreams.? Soon, you?ll find yourselves going through the motions and eventually you may even find yourselves taking each other for granted. Relationships need nurturing, maintenance, and every now and again, a spark to re-ignite the love you share together. You will find that giving and receiving a spark here and there will remind you of all the beautiful reasons why you love the person you?re with and allow you to take a step back for a second to feel appreciation.

Finding little sparks or little ways to show that you care is a simple task. Your only job is to be thoughtful. Here are 5 ways to show you really care.

Leave Them a Note This method is the most expressive. Surprising your loved one with a note that is taped to the bathroom mirror, the front door, or their windshield is priceless. It?s a surprise that is heartwarming and appreciated. Everyone loves to hear how much they?re appreciated especially when it?s out of the blue. As I type this, I?m looking at a note that?s taped to my computer screen that was written for me.

I love you and appreciate all of your qualities. Each day I spend with you I find new reasons to love you.

Wow! I never get tired of reading it.

Have Dinner or Breakfast Ready! Another thoughtful gesture is to have a nice romantic dinner prepared when your lover comes home. This is especially effective if normally you don?t cook or if dinner is rarely prepared when they get home. Make one of their favorite meals and you may be rewarded in the bedroom later on.

Another thought is to prepare and serve your lover breakfast in bed. That doesn?t happen every day so this idea is always a welcomed surprise.

Listen! Be Attentive! One of the easiest ways to a person?s heart is when you listen and are attentive during the most unimportant conversations. Did your lover mention that they?re starting to hate their cell phone or did they bring up that they?re starting to get stressed at work? Take opportunities like these to show that you?re always listening and to show that you care. Buy your lover the latest handy dandy cell phone or buy them a massage and relaxation treatment at a local spa. You?ll score big with this one!

Take Them Somewhere Unexpected The day before, tell your lover that you want them all to yourself the following day. Don?t provide them with any details except for the time to be ready and how they should dress. Surprise your lover with a short road trip or a romantic evening. Take them to their favorite sporting event or a play at the performing arts theater. Surprise them with what they enjoy and allow them to share the experience with the person they enjoy.

Send Them a Text or an Email During our crazy 8 hour days, we experience stress, frustration, and office politics. Our minds are so focused on fixing the next issue or learning the new process that we rarely have the time to think about our home life and the people in our life that bring us joy. Send your lover a quick text or email to let them know that you?re thinking of them and that you can?t wait until you see them. Let them know that all you can think about is having them in your arms. With the day that they?re having, this is sure to bring a smile to their face!Author for LoveFlu.com

One source of immeasurable misery in relationships is thinking that the past will repeat itself. Sorry People have changed, life is different, and nothing is the same today as it was yesterday.

WARNING! Listen to The Drunk Monkey in your head. Mine says Matthew Ferry, you are insane! There are many things the same today as yesterday you noodle head!

Look again. Everything is slowly changing, eroding, degrading, evolving, emerging and transforming. Especially people.

Yet The Drunk Monkey (your mental chatter) takes a snap shot of today and then carries it forward into tomorrow. Really bad idea. Especially with people.

My single friends are not delighted that it is, once again, Valentine's Day. Reassuring them that being single on Valentines Day can be just as much fun (and sometimes better) as being part of a long-standing couple does not go down well.

I happen to believe that Valentines Day is perfectly peachy if you are in the first six months of a relationship. Or if you are frisking around breaking hearts and having yours broken. But for longtime couples, 14 February tends to elicit responses ranging from 'ho hum' and 'very nice, thank you, darling' to a hissing, snarling diatribe against the massive con trick of commercialism that is Valentine's Day.

While it's very nice to receive a gift of flowers or perfume from someone with whom you have been sharing toothpaste and a lavatory for years, it does not pack the same emotional punch as a card or rose from a surprising source, a fan you didn't know you had. An expensive, lacy piece of something from the lingerie family (a gift for him masquerading as 'what you've always wanted') is lovely when you're in the early days of a love affair but, years later, when what you really want is a YSL Roady (a gift for you), it's not so thrilling. Trust me.

I think the answer to a happy Valentine's Day is all in the thrill, myself. (I would be beyond thrilled. Guru, with a Roady. I am just saying…). So if I were single now I would take a chance. I'd probably send the object of my affections a batch of heart-shaped cookies, even though my mother always said not to, under any circumstances. What's the worst that could happen? You discover he's not that interested. Is that terrible? At least you would realize that you were up a dead end, and instantly stop wasting your time and move on.

Men come and go but time is finite. You do not have masses of it to waste on one who 'isn't that into you'. You're not sad; that's sad.

What else to do on and around 14 February? I'd go out dancing with my other single girlfriends. I'd stay home and watch three episodes of The Wire, back to back. I'd eat too many chocolates in bed. And sleep diagonally across the bed if I felt like it. All the good stuff you can't do when you're in a relationship.

The Guru has not yet given me a YSL Roady but he has passed on the odd nugget of wisdom. And one of his all-time greats is this: you do not have to make yourself miserable by wishing for what you haven't got. Learn to value what you have instead.

So this February, single girls, that gem is my Valentine to you all: love what you've got. Then go looking for love. See you on the dance floor.

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Our psyche, what we eat, what we do and our skin are inter-related.
Love the skin you're in!